It Was the Pretzel's Fault!: RopeVine Fever
by CrystalSlashlover
Summary: Requested by: The Obsidian Angel "So you should do a Kyou/Tama one shot. Kyou/Tama. Not Tama/Kyou.That involves rope. And bug spray. And a pretzel. Yes I'm serious." Basically, I'm feeling generous and making one-shots for anyone that asks. YAOI!


**Alright! So this is a request story from: The Obsidian Angel! It's a Kyou/Tama, KyouxTama, as in boyxboy. Alright! So this is what she requested:**

**So you should do a Kyou/Tama one shot. Kyou/Tama. Not Tama/Kyou.That involves rope. And bug spray. And a pretzel. Yes I'm serious.**

**-.-; Yeesh... That's gonna take a while to figure out a-Got it! Also, it's 1:01am here! Yeah! Yeah! ... &cough& Forgot the bug spray, but you do get bugs!**

**It Was The Pretzel's Fault!: Rope-Vine Fever**

"Damnit Tamaki! Drop it!"

"Ie! No! No! It's so salty! It's so good!" A long lick.

"Ah! T-tamaki, I told you to drop it!"

"Ie ie ie ie ie ie!! It's too addicting!" A light nibble.

"&hiss& Tamaki!"

"&whine&Kyouya!" Another lick.

"Fuck! Drop the damn pretzel you idiot!" Kyouya demanded as the two rich teens ran for their lives.

"Ie! It's so big Kyouya! Look at how BIG it is!" Tamaki marvelled, his eyes sparkling as he gazed upon the huge and heavily salted pretzel. "Oh commoner food... How I love thee..."

"Urasai you baka! That pretzel is attracting the killer bugs!" Kyouya informed for the tenth time, jumping over a root.

"Noooo!"

Currently, the two teens were running away from killer Qetuosfhkz(pronounced: Wetoffs), which were a mixture of wasps, yellow jackets, a few undiscovered Rain forest bugs, and some kind of animal that loves salt and bread... maybe a dog... I dunno! Let me explain since you're probably confused.

_Tamaki had managed to drag Kyouya to Mexico for the Summer Vacation after Haruhi had brought him back to the Host Club, insisting that the two of them celebrate with an exspensive trip. Upon entering the city after unpacking, Tamaki had laid eyes on a pretzel stand, and was immediately eraptured. The man had warned Tamaki not to go into the jungle with said pretzel... but it was in Spanish, and when Kyouya had asked if Tamaki had understood anything he had said, Tamaki replied:_

_"He said: Thank you for buying the food! I am most grateful! Enjoy your stay... and um... Try some smoothies... man!"_

_"... You have no idea... Do you?"_

_"Not a clue! Hey! Let's go to the forest here! It'll be fun!"_

And, that's how they ended up in this situation.

After a while, the two teens managed to find a place to hide, the freaky bugs buzzing right by them.

"Phew!" Tamaki sighed, leaning against a tree. "That was a close one!"

"For once, I agree with-"

"I almost dropped my pretzel!" Tamaki exclaimed, presenting his beloved pretzel and kissing it lovingly. "But I would never lose you! Isn't that right? Ne? Ne?" he cooed, making Kyouya sweat drop.

"Moron..." he muttered, sliding down the tree he was currently leaning on and sitting. He checked his cell and cursed when he saw it had no service. "Figures..."

"Hey!" exclaimed Tamaki suddenly, causing Kyouya to look up and stare at the sight, a huge, brown, rope looking vine was wrapped around Tamaki's pretzel and the human and plant were... playing tug-o-war. "Give it back! It's mine! Mine! Miiiine!" Tamaki whined, pulling and pulling, before he gasped as the vine suddenly tugged so hard that he fell deeper in the forest, a small cry emitting from the ditsy blonde.

"Tamaki!" Kyouya exclaimed, standing up and walking deeper into the forest. Hey, he may hit, insult, and hurt the idiot a lot, but they were still friends. Tamaki had been his first real friend at Ouran Academy. "Tamaki! Can you hear me?!"

"I-itai... K-kyouya?" Kyouya heard Tamaki question not too far away.

"Hold on Tamaki! I'll be there in a sec... ond?" he stared-he seemed to be doing that a lot recently-at the sight before him. a huge plant that was at least twenty feet tall, had it's rope like vines wrapped around Tamaki's wrists, holding them together, his legs bound to the plant... that looked like rope. Tamaki winced as the vines tightened, gasping in slight pain.

"K-ky-ou-ya..." he managed brokenly, pain coursing through him.

"Tamaki! Kami! What-"

"My pretzel! They took it! It hurts! It hurts!" Tamaki whined, making Kyouya anime fall.

"You... You..." growled Kyouya, clenching his fists.

"Pretzel! Pretzel! I want my-" he suddenly stopped, his eyes wide in shock, before they glazed and his lids lowered slightly as he stared almost unseeingly at the ground, his chin falling to his chest. Anger dissapeared from Kyouya's system as he watched this happen, confusion replacing it.

"Tamaki?"

"..."

"Are you alright?" he questioned, a little freaked his friend hadn't responded.

"Nng..." a small sound escaped Tamaki as a shudder rushed over the blonde. Worry coursed high in Kyouya's mind, though he didn't dare touch Tamaki, not sure if he was contagious. "Ahn..." he made another sound, wriggling slightly.

"Tamaki, what's wrong... well, besides the fact that you're being held against a monster plant." he asked.

"... Kyouya..." Tamaki murmured, his voice sounding distant, giddy and... deep? Tamaki tilted his head up slightly, looking up from under his bangs. "Kyouya... I feel... so odd..."

"Eh?"

"My body... it's so... _hot_... and my mouth is so dry... and my stomach is clenching... so _tightly_..." he informed the other, gaining a freaked out and slightly blushing Kyouya.

"N-nani?" This sounded like... But it couldn't be... But what else...

"And... and you..." Tamaki continued, his breaths coming fast. "And you... your scent..."

'My scent?' Kyouya thought, getting beyond freaked out.

"Your scent... it... drives me crazy..." he whispered, straining against the rope-vines and trying to get closer to Kyouya. "You smell... so... _delicious_." he practically purred, managing to reach Kyouya's ear.

"T-tamaki..." Kyouya murmured, his heart picking up pace, his own mouth drying. But he quickly snapped himself out of it. "I-I need to get you down from there!"

"Don't you like it?"

"What?"

"Don't you like it?" Tamaki asked again. "Don't you like me like this? Like me bound so tightly, so securely? I do... I like it a lot." Tamaki exspressed, leaning his head against the palnt and-'He's not! He's not!-moaning softly as another rope-vine slightered up and gently caressed his neck, almost acting like a snake. Kyouya watched as this happened, temptation ringing her sweet bell. He had like Tamaki for a while now. A long time. Ever since he first heard him play piano. This was something-if a little different... okay alot different-out of his fantasy's. Tamaki. Bound. Talking intelligently. Seductively. But... This wasn't of Tamaki's free will. This was the plant. It had to be.

"Tamaki... I'll cut you out." Kyouya stated, pulled a knife from his pocket. At the sight, Tamaki licked his lips.

"Oooh... A kinky boy, aren't you Kyouya?" he purred. "Mmm... I like..."

Kyouya blushed hard, leaning forward to cut the vines.

'You can do this! Just ignore him. Ignore him. Ignore-'

"Nnm!" Kyouya exclaimed when suddenly, Tamaki's lips were on his, so soft, so earnest so... salty. Probably from the pretzel. Immediately his stomach caught on sweet-fire, need splashing down. No! No, he can't fall for this! He can't! But his lips... so delicious... so good...

Tamaki parted their lips, eyes opening slightly and licking his lips slowly.

"Kyouya... you know you want it."

And his control was lost

OKAY! THERE IS A LEMON HERE PEOPLE! IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ IT, SKIP AHEAD!!

Kyouya smashed their lips together, his sin, lust, finally let loose as he kissed Tamaki hard and long, provoking a pleasured moan from Tamaki's throat. Kyouya let his hands explore Tamaki slowly as they kissed, brushing against his hips and thighs and legs and arms and neck, and hair, entangling in the silky locks. He parted their lips, both panting for air, Tamaki's eyes still closed, his lips opened slightly, cheeks pinkened. He looked stunning.

"Kyouya..." Tamaki breathed. "I didn't know you could be so intense..." he opened his eyes slowly, devilishness revealed. "What has this naughty boy been keeping from Papa?"

Kyouya smirked, letting one hand slip down and under Tamaki's shirt, making the younger teen shiver. "You think you have a right to know?" he whispered, brushing his thumb teasingly, lightly over Tamaki's left nipple, already pert.

Tamaki gasped slightly, before he whispered,

"I think Papa does. Papa has a right to know _everything_."

Kyouya smirked.

"Alright... If you insist..." Kyouya leaned closer to Tamaki, let his lips rest softly on a pale ear. "Everyday, since I heard you play, I've been having..._ urges_..." Kyouya whispered, pinching Tamaki's nipple on the word 'urges'.

"Nn... Really?" Tamaki whispered back, his heart racing, excitement boiling hot and ready inside.

"Hai... These urges... These _hot_," he twisted the nipple. "_Needy_." the hand slowly slid down, scraping against Tamaki's flawless skin, earning a shiver. "_Stabbing_." the one buried in Tamaki's hair yanked hard, earning a choked moan. "_Hard_, urges... That made me crazy, made me... _desperate_." His hand trailed and skimmed the hem of Tamaki's pants, making a frustrated groan escape the other. "So desperate... I resorted to intercourse..." he continued, issuing an angered growl from Tamaki. Kyouya chuckled. "Jealous?"

"You're mine!" exclaimed Tamaki, possesiveness wringing off the teen. This aura died however when his chin was grabbed, his head turned to meet obsidian.

"No. You're mistaken." Kyouya hissed, sending tingles and shivers down Tamaki's spine. "You're **mine** Suoh. You belong to me. Not the other way around." he stated, and to make his point, skated his hand across Tamaki's straining erection and earning an impatient moan. "As I was saying... I became desperate. I had sex wiht many women, sucking their necks, pounding into them, taking them making them submit... But my... _urges_ refused to leave me." he continued, beginning to trail his lips down Tamaki's neck and nipping and pulling sighs and light moans from Tamaki. "I wanted to _touch..._" he cut the shirt and threw away the knife as he let hot, wet kisses pamper Tamaki's chest, sucking and licking at his nipples, Tamaki struggling, wanting to touch Kyouya, entangle his fingers in his raven hair. "_Feel_..." his hands slid down Tamaki's waist and hook into Tamaki's pants as he slowly but surely kissed and nipped his way down to his destination, Tamaki watching with fascination and lust. "_Smell_..." he licked a line to the hem, before he pulled down the pants to mid-thigh, smirking at the boxerless, brief, and pantyless sight, Tamaki's engorged member being released into the air and making Tamaki shudder and moan. "And most of all..." he positioned his mouth in front of Tamaki's member, his eyes trained on the head. "_Taste."_

"Ah!... Oh... Fuck..." Tamaki moaned/groaned, slamming his head back against the plant as he was taken inside Kyouya's hot, tight, mouth. "So good... Mmng... yeah... Nn..." he clenched his fists tightly, eyes closed as he imagined his hands pulling and tugging hard at Kyouya's hair. How was Kyouya so good at this?! He felt like he was in Heaven!

'Yes... Oooh... Yes, Kyouya...' he thought, trying to buck, and whining when the rope-vines snaked up to hold down his hips. 'No! No! I need to- Oh _yessss_...'

Kyouya licked and sucked animatedly, loving the salty, odd flavor of Tamaki's staff, taking high pleasure in his moans and groans, and letting a groan out himself, smirking as Tamaki hissed. His eyes were closed, his hands on Tamaki's thighs as he began to bob his head, greedily taking in Tamaki's pre-cum. He sucked hard, knowing by the rushed pants and the mumbled, broken pleas, Tamaki was tossing his head from side-to-side.

Feeling sadistic, Kyouya slid his mouth off of Tamaki's member and stood, earning a glare from the flushed and needy teen.

"What are you-" Tamaki was cut off as Kyouya kissed him, and engaged their tongues in battle, letting him taste himself. Suddenly, Kyouya broke away, eyes glazed.

"I want the lower vines gone..." he panted, knowing that Tamaki controled the vine-ropes at some level. The rope-vines slithered away, letting Tamaki relax his legs... but only for a moment. Suddenly, he was facing the plant, Kyouya rubbing up against his posterior, his erection still clothed.

"Tamaki..." Kyouya whispered heatedly, his hands on either side of Tamaki's head as he was pushed more fully against the plant, moaning as his erection rubbed against the slky brown thing. "Do you want me?"

"Yes..." Tamaki moaned softly.

"Do you want me to penetrate you?"

"Y-yes..."

"Do you want me to fuck you so hard you can't even remember your name?"

"Hah..." Tamaki panted, his cheeks reddening in embarrasment and high arousal.

"Is that what you want?"

"Yes."

"What?"

"Yes!"

"I'm going to make you cum so hard Tamaki..." Kyouya promised, easily slipping out of his pants. "I'm going to make you scream my name you little whore..."

Tamaki shivered at the vulgar name, and pressed back earnestly against Kyouya's bare erection.

"Yes..."

"What are you?"

"A... A whore..."

"I can't hear you..."

"A... whore."

"Hmm... Maybe you don't want me fuck you?" he whispered smirking as he pulled back slightly.

"No!"

"What are you?"

"A whore!"

"Who's?"

"Yours!" Tamaki cried out desperately, pushing desperately against Kyouya's rock hard erection, spreading his legs and offering himself.

"... Good boy..." Kyouya whispered huskily. "Have you done this before?"

"...Hai. Many times."

"Hn. Figures..." he then entered, harsh and hard without preperation, making Tamaki scream in pleasure and Kyouya grunt and groan at the tightness. "Fuck..."

"Move." urged Tamaki, working weakl against Kyouya. "Move now... Move in me... I need it..." Tamaki pleaded.

Soon, the two teens were thrusting against each other, wanton moans falling from Tamaki's kiss bruised lips, while soft groans and curses fell from Kyouya's own.

"Hah! Nng! H-harder!" Tamaki demanded, and keened as the thick member inside him hit hard against his prostate. "YES!"

Kyouya bent his head and bit harshly at Tamaki's neck, adding to Tamaki's pleasure. He let a hand slip down to hold Tamaki's hard member and stroke in tandem with their thrusts.

"You want to cum?" he whispered, ramming hard into Tamaki's prostate, making the blonde arch and throw back his head, Dribble managed to escape his mouth, his mind hardly registering anything else.

"Y-yes..." he moaned, thrusting back needily against Kouya. He was close... so close...

"How bad?" Kyouya squeezed Tamaki's member hard, making the teen moan deeply as he bucked into the hand.

"So _bad_... Please..." Tamaki looked over his shoulder, cheeks a deep, cherry red and eyes sparkling with deep need and lust. "Please... Make me cum Kyouya-sama..." he whispered crying out as the pace on his erection sped up, as well as the thrusts.And then, they were cumming, Tamaki screaming Kyouya's name while Kyouya panted and praised Tamaki with whispered words.

ALRIGHT. YOU CAN OPEN YOUR EYES NOW

As they panted, exaughsted, Kyouya wrapped his arms around Tamaki's chest and held him close, gaining a weak, appreticative sigh. The rope-vines let Tamaki's wrists go, and siad teen slumped back against Kyouya, shivering as he was gently turned around so that his bare chest met Kyouya's clothed one, his head laid in the crook of the other's neck.

"Kyouya..."

"... Let's clean ourselves up."

**pb**

Now fully dressed, and in their hotel room, the two teens were silent. Tamaki had returned to his usual self, except quiet, as he chewed on the new pretzel he had bought. After a moment, Kyouya sighed.

"Tamaki... I must apologize for taking advantage of you when that plant had infected you with... Whatever it injected you with. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Oh, that!" chirped Tamaki, not looking at the other as he stared down at the pretzel. "It wasn't the plant's fault!"

Kyouya's eyes snapped to the blonde, confusion filling him.

"What do you mean?"

As if only then realizing what he had just said, Tamaki blushed and blinked owilishly, squirming slightly on his bed.

"Er... That's just how I get when I'm... aroused..." he squeaked out the last word, before he passionately bit into the pretzel.

"... You..." Kyouya shook his head, before he stood, walked over to Tamaki, and smacked him upside the head.

"Itai! What was that fo-mmph!" his words were cut off when Kyouya kissed him soundly and pushed him down on the bed.

"You moron... You need to be punished..." Kyouya whispered before he smirked evilly, making Tamaki' seyes widen.

"N-no! It wasn't my fault! It was the pretzel! The PRET-Ahn... Maybe Papa... has been a bad boy lately..."

"My thoughts exactly..."

**YESH!!**

**Okay! So I finally got this done! Yeah! Tell me what you think!**


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